My Biggest Fear

Confession: I have this crazy fear of letting other people down. Can you relate? What's your biggest fear? 

I am a people-pleaser. I do not like to say "no" to people. In fact, I bend over backwards to make sure that everyone is happy. I try to fix things. If there's a fight--I don't like to leave things unsaid or unsettled (I HATE going to bed angry and I will toss and turn all night long if a fight is left unresolved). If my friends are fighting with each other, I try to mend the fences. I do not know why, but I feel RESPONSIBLE--like it's my job to be the "fixer."

This has been true of my for all of my life. I don't know where this comes from--but I can remember picking guys in the past because I thought I could "save" or "help" them. That they were going to magically date me and then be all better--I was going to turn them into fine, upstanding citizens. HAH! Like I have that type of power? As if! (Yup, bringing back the 90s lingo on this one).

These same fears trickle into my business--

-I have a fear of letting down my challengers. Will I be a good enough coach? Will I be able to help them achieve their goals?

-I have a fear of letting down my coaches. Will I be able to lead them well? Will their businesses succeed? Will it be my fault if they don't do well?

-I have a fear of letting down my own coach. Will she think I'm doing a good job? Will she be proud of me and the fact I'm on her team?

Today, I cried. And I faced the fact that I have been holding onto this idea of CONTROL for far too long. I cannot control everything. And to be honest, knowing that is a RELIEF! GOD is in control. I don't know why I feel the need to play at having control over anyone else's actions--I can't control if people want to go after their dreams. I can't control if people cheat on their plans and skip workouts or eat clean. I can't control their results. I can't control if my coaches follow the training I'm giving them. I cannot post to their Facebook pages for them. I cannot do the work for them.

BUT, I CAN control my own thoughts and actions. I CAN decide to be positive. To read my goals and affirmations daily. To BELIEVE that I can "make it" in this coaching biz and run a successful, thriving team. I CAN control who I decide to work with--and I'll be working with the WILLING from now on. I will be working with people who want to share their goals with me and make a DECISION to CHANGE and I promise I will be there to support them along the way.

YOU CAN decide the same things. Let God be in control of everyone else. FOCUS on controlling your own thoughts and actions. Stay positive. And LISTEN to that inner voice inside you telling you that THIS ISN'T IT! YOU were MADE FOR MORE! We weren't made to live mediocre, boring lives working in jobs we either hate or are bored with...Let's change that fact and chase our dreams together <3heart emoticon 

Thanks for listening!